The day I ruined it for EVERYONE.
This is the only picture I'll post. It was before we hit the water and everything was perfect.
Rarely in my life have I felt as low as I do right now.
Here's the story.
Our Saturday Lake Erie crossing was pushed to Sunday due to wind etc. Sunday I was ready. I was pumped. Many of my swim family were there either to swim or as crew. It was glorious.
Quickly into the boat ride over we realized that the water was not exactly flat. It was a challenge for boat captains trying to make good time yet not sink their craft. For much of the ride I was at the front of my boat taking the brunt of the waves. I was feeling very much like the vikings portrayed on their boat journey in the 13th Warrior movie. I even proclaimed "Ragnar of the lake!" as we went (Vikings television series). I was determined. I was ready. It was glorious.
The relay teams started first. Then we solo swimmers lined the shire. Warriors ready for battle. Some strangers some friends, all with one conquest. It was glorious.
The swim began. There was no time to worry about other teams. I had my eye on my crew every stroke, quick feed every 15 minutes. I was with the lake and the lake was with me. We danced, held hands, battled for Alpha position and it was glorious.
I actually was having a blast. On the large waves you would have seen me smiling, even laughing. On a couple of the giant waves I would cheer and yell. I was more worried for my boat which had to settle in a less favorable position. But there I was - top of the world.... I felt like a superhero.... and it was glorious.
Then came the mistake. It was a blink of an eye which my crew immediately tried to undo but much like jumping off the cliff there was no fixing it. We lost our glory.
It was my 15 minute interval. I noticed that getting to my drink was exceedingly difficult and once I got it there was an immediate pull on the rope forcing me to let go for sake of the rules. I finally got my drink but the issue was the boat ran out of gas. They were filling up and what was said was something very similar to "we're just filling up and we're right behind you". There it is. I took off with glory on my mind. With the conditions there was no looking back and I thought they were in fact right behind me. They continued to drift and quickly we were out of sight. The waves made the difference. The crew told me later that they immediately tried to call me back but it was immediately to late. We lost our glory.
At some point I popped my head up. I was alone. Thus is in fact the point where the potential to panic was great. I kept my head on my shoulders. No boats in sight. I knew the waves were coming over my left. I could see a tower in Buffalo on my right. I bobbed until I saw a lighthouse in Canada on my left. I knew roughly what time it was and as such I knew roughly where the sun should be. I picked my path (remarkably close to the one I wanted to be on) and swam. There was no going back (to where?) as I'd be drinking the waves every stroke. There was no staying put (for what?) it actually would have been more work. I swam. That's what I was there for and with or without my boat it was going to be the same. "Alone then" I decided. I was in search of a new glory.
At some point I started seeing boat traffic. Getting hit by an unaware boat was my only real concern. Then I realized that they might be search boats. I hoped to myself that my boat would magically show up so that I could continue this epic swim and race. Chasing glory.
The Coast Guard found me and someone on the crew yelled "do you know how many people are looking for you?" I was hoping the number was 3, that of my crew. They told me to get out of the water. I asked if I could wait there until my boat showed up, believing that I was still in the race. "No sir, your race is done. You are being extracted. " Again, the glory was gone.
It was a very demoralizing boat ride in. I had made 10km or better in great time. It was all in reach. All of it.
When I got to shore there were some very excited people. Somehow the story had become that I had gone unconscious which was not factual. This was the medical directors understanding and so they were urging me to go to the hospital via ambulance. Once the dust settled and it became obvious that I was never in distress I was allowed to remain at the scene. At this point I was told that everyone had been pulled. Someone sugar coated it and said that it was due to the conditions. I began to feel relieved. Then came the horrifying truth... they were pulled because of a missing swimmer. Me.
I cannot even begin to describe the feeling. Knowing everything that the swimmers and crew had gone through..... ruined.
Some of the friends I had out there tried to lessen the blow telling me that they were secretly grateful to be pulled due to conditions. Some others have said many wonderful things and I thank you all.
Some of you are furious. I say you are right to be so. This was an epic fail on my part. I have no way of expressing my sorrow and I have way of making amends.
I come to you my swim family broken, humbled, ashamed, and humiliated. I will take the brunt of this and I step forward to receive my lashes. I can only ask forgiveness.
To Miguel, Josh, and anyone else involved.... you did a fantastic job and the fact that I ruined this for you breaks my heart.
On the TV show Vikings - Ragnar the great warrior king leads his army into battle against Frankia. He loses the battle and disappears humiliated.
Ragnar of the Lake indeed.
Until I touch the wall.....
Michael Kenny
Masters Swimmer
Cambridge Mavericks
Marathon Open Water Swimmer
2015-16 Global Swim Series Champion
Contact Info :
F : https://www.facebook.com/swim.diesel
I : https://www.instagram.com/swim.diesel
T : https://twitter.com/SwimDiesel
E : m.j.kenny@swim-diesel.com
+ : google.com/+Swim-diesel
B : 53724F20
Rarely in my life have I felt as low as I do right now.
Here's the story.
Our Saturday Lake Erie crossing was pushed to Sunday due to wind etc. Sunday I was ready. I was pumped. Many of my swim family were there either to swim or as crew. It was glorious.
Quickly into the boat ride over we realized that the water was not exactly flat. It was a challenge for boat captains trying to make good time yet not sink their craft. For much of the ride I was at the front of my boat taking the brunt of the waves. I was feeling very much like the vikings portrayed on their boat journey in the 13th Warrior movie. I even proclaimed "Ragnar of the lake!" as we went (Vikings television series). I was determined. I was ready. It was glorious.
The relay teams started first. Then we solo swimmers lined the shire. Warriors ready for battle. Some strangers some friends, all with one conquest. It was glorious.
The swim began. There was no time to worry about other teams. I had my eye on my crew every stroke, quick feed every 15 minutes. I was with the lake and the lake was with me. We danced, held hands, battled for Alpha position and it was glorious.
I actually was having a blast. On the large waves you would have seen me smiling, even laughing. On a couple of the giant waves I would cheer and yell. I was more worried for my boat which had to settle in a less favorable position. But there I was - top of the world.... I felt like a superhero.... and it was glorious.
Then came the mistake. It was a blink of an eye which my crew immediately tried to undo but much like jumping off the cliff there was no fixing it. We lost our glory.
It was my 15 minute interval. I noticed that getting to my drink was exceedingly difficult and once I got it there was an immediate pull on the rope forcing me to let go for sake of the rules. I finally got my drink but the issue was the boat ran out of gas. They were filling up and what was said was something very similar to "we're just filling up and we're right behind you". There it is. I took off with glory on my mind. With the conditions there was no looking back and I thought they were in fact right behind me. They continued to drift and quickly we were out of sight. The waves made the difference. The crew told me later that they immediately tried to call me back but it was immediately to late. We lost our glory.
At some point I popped my head up. I was alone. Thus is in fact the point where the potential to panic was great. I kept my head on my shoulders. No boats in sight. I knew the waves were coming over my left. I could see a tower in Buffalo on my right. I bobbed until I saw a lighthouse in Canada on my left. I knew roughly what time it was and as such I knew roughly where the sun should be. I picked my path (remarkably close to the one I wanted to be on) and swam. There was no going back (to where?) as I'd be drinking the waves every stroke. There was no staying put (for what?) it actually would have been more work. I swam. That's what I was there for and with or without my boat it was going to be the same. "Alone then" I decided. I was in search of a new glory.
At some point I started seeing boat traffic. Getting hit by an unaware boat was my only real concern. Then I realized that they might be search boats. I hoped to myself that my boat would magically show up so that I could continue this epic swim and race. Chasing glory.
The Coast Guard found me and someone on the crew yelled "do you know how many people are looking for you?" I was hoping the number was 3, that of my crew. They told me to get out of the water. I asked if I could wait there until my boat showed up, believing that I was still in the race. "No sir, your race is done. You are being extracted. " Again, the glory was gone.
It was a very demoralizing boat ride in. I had made 10km or better in great time. It was all in reach. All of it.
When I got to shore there were some very excited people. Somehow the story had become that I had gone unconscious which was not factual. This was the medical directors understanding and so they were urging me to go to the hospital via ambulance. Once the dust settled and it became obvious that I was never in distress I was allowed to remain at the scene. At this point I was told that everyone had been pulled. Someone sugar coated it and said that it was due to the conditions. I began to feel relieved. Then came the horrifying truth... they were pulled because of a missing swimmer. Me.
I cannot even begin to describe the feeling. Knowing everything that the swimmers and crew had gone through..... ruined.
Some of the friends I had out there tried to lessen the blow telling me that they were secretly grateful to be pulled due to conditions. Some others have said many wonderful things and I thank you all.
Some of you are furious. I say you are right to be so. This was an epic fail on my part. I have no way of expressing my sorrow and I have way of making amends.
I come to you my swim family broken, humbled, ashamed, and humiliated. I will take the brunt of this and I step forward to receive my lashes. I can only ask forgiveness.
To Miguel, Josh, and anyone else involved.... you did a fantastic job and the fact that I ruined this for you breaks my heart.
On the TV show Vikings - Ragnar the great warrior king leads his army into battle against Frankia. He loses the battle and disappears humiliated.
Ragnar of the Lake indeed.
Until I touch the wall.....
Michael Kenny
Masters Swimmer
Cambridge Mavericks
Marathon Open Water Swimmer
2015-16 Global Swim Series Champion
Contact Info :
F : https://www.facebook.com/swim.diesel
I : https://www.instagram.com/swim.diesel
T : https://twitter.com/SwimDiesel
E : m.j.kenny@swim-diesel.com
+ : google.com/+Swim-diesel
B : 53724F20