Buried Alive: The Vulnerable Story Behind Jaxson Riddle’s Freeride Evolution
Over the years freeride has had more than it’s fair share of unique personalities. Riders who come through the scene and uniquely express themselves in ways that fundamentally change the sport. And in recent years, few have left a more distinguished mark than Jaxson Riddle. With a deep bag of moto inspired tricks and a style thats uniquely his own, Jaxson is carving his own path in unapologetic fashion on the bike. But it’s important to remember that there’s more than what meets the eye. What happens on the bike is only part of the equation and often what happens off of it isn’t always quite as glamorous. In his latest video project Buried Alive Jaxson Riddle gives us a glimpse into his personal life, sharing insights about his struggles with grief and mental health after the loss of his dad in 2020.
For those who haven’t been through it, this kind of loss is difficult to explain. It’s more than just a dark cloud or a shock to the system, it’s the type of thing that fundamentally changes you. Grief swallows you whole and takes your whole world with it. As someone who has unfortunately been in the position of losing both of my parents, I can only really describe the feeling of living in a world without them, like living in a world without a sun. It’s surreal, it’s dark, and it’s the type of thing that simply doesn’t make sense — and frankly never will. But with the tragedy comes triumph and while these heavy things never get easier, our strength and our capacity to carry them grows. As my own grief comes and goes, I truly would like to say to anyone out there in a similar position that, as cheesy as it may sound: you're not alone. I'd also like to commend Jaxson for taking on this heavy and vulnerable topic.
For Jaxson his grief took an immense toll and following the loss of his father he described trying to continue living a normal life in the wake of grief like “trying to put a bandaid over a bullet wound.” He struggled with suicidal thoughts, and it was only after hitting some of his lowest points and sharing those struggles with his fiancé Taylan, that he began piece together a new way in the world that had once taken everything from him. He was reminded that he was a son, a father, and a friend, and he said that having the outlet of riding is one of the main reasons he made it out of that dark time. Jaxson encouraged people who may be facing similar struggles to lean into appreciating the time you do have with people and take it in as best you can in the present moment.
In the videos final moments Jaxson leaves us with this: “Tomorrow isn’t here yet, yesterday is gone…this moment is the only thing thats real. And once you can really tap into that, and realize that, I think it changes everything.” Grief is something that you never get over, but instead something that you must learn to walk along side of.
Additionally, if you or someone you know is struggling with grief, loss, and even suicidal ideation, I’ll link a few resources below. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not one of weakness.
- In the case of a mental health emergency: Dial/text 988 or visit: https://988lifeline.org/
- Somebody’s Thinking About You (S.T.A.Y.) is a 501(c)(3) non-profit committed to raising awareness, reducing stigma, and educating the action sports community about mental wellness and suicide prevention: https://somebodysthinkingaboutyou.org/
- What’s Your Grief is an online grief-specific resource: https://whatsyourgrief.com/
- Psychology today is a great way to find therapists and seek professional support: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us