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The 12th Annual Razzballies

02

Officially, this is the 11.5th Razzballie ceremony, and our first socially distanced one. *looks out at the cardboard cutout audience* I see some familiar faces out there. There's the cutout that sells me car wax at Pep Boys. Good to see you! Figure you'd like some recycled jokes, since you're all made of biodegradable material. *eerie silence* Okay, moving on. I'll be your host for the ceremony after A-Rod backed out. Turns out he couldn't host, he's just a parasite! It's all right he's a no-show, you can’t spell ghosting without host. You also can’t spell hostage, but no one is forcing you to stay for the award show. You’re going to want to, though, because without these awards, you’ll have no idea who was the best and worst hitters and pitchers in this absurdly abbreviated year, and you’ll be left giving out your own awards and no one cares if your “Low sodium tomato soup in a sourdough bowl” won your “Whitest Lunch Of All-Time” award. Stop making up fake awards! Leave that to me. Anyway, here’s the year-end awards for the best and worst of fantasy baseball:

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