The Element Of Toxic Masculinity In The Santa Fe High School Shooting
"Don't take 'No' for an answer."
"'No' is just a slow 'Yes'"
"If at first you don't succeed..."
These approaches might be okay in certain professional situations, or if there is chocolate involved. Too often, though, it is also the philosophy men and boys use when pursuing women and girls. In THAT case? It is toxic and dangerous. Boys need to be taught that the first "No" is the final answer. Lives are at stake.
Apparently the teenaged boy who murdered 8 of his classmates, two teachers, and wounded 13 others at Santa Fe High school, near Houston on Friday couldn't take no for an answer from one of his victims. Shana Fisher's mother told the L.A. Times that he'd been pursuing Shana for the four months leading up to the shooting. Shana had repeatedly turned him down, and he'd become more and more aggressive in his pursuit of her until she stood up to him in class, which embarrassed him. This was the week before the shooting. Shana's mother believes she was the first person he shot and killed on Friday.
There are people who complain #MeToo has gone too far, when we're learning of the existence of Incel groups - men who hold such toxic misogynistic thoughts they believe they're entitled to sex with whichever women they want. An eye-opening and nauseating read from Jia Tolentino in The New Yorker spelled it out clearly.