My partner is jealous of my son and wants me to kick him out of the house
DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner moans endlessly about my 20-year-old son, saying he doesn’t pay his way and uses our home like a hotel.
My partner is 48, I’m 45 and we have been together for 10 years.
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He used to be a rugby coach and was out three nights a week for training and then most weekends for matches.
My son and I used to enjoy our quiet evenings together.
Since my partner gave up coaching, he complains about my son most evenings, going on about how my son is a sponger or not putting his dishes in the dishwasher.
My son is now studying at college for a business degree and works a few hours part-time in a supermarket.
My partner complains that he doesn’t pay us rent, but he hardly eats a thing at home. He mostly eats either at college or at work.
I’m fed up. My son is a great lad, never causes me any problems.
He has two friends he goes out with – he doesn’t drink or do drugs, and never gets into trouble, plus he is a loving son to me.
Is my partner jealous or just a grumpy old man?
DEIDRE SAYS: He’s jealous and he struggles with having a young man around the house whose company you seem to prefer.
Balance the time you dedicate to your partner and your son.
Pick a good moment to tell your partner you love him, but you love your son too and he’s a good kid.
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Maybe your partner’s early years were tough but, unless money is really tight, expecting rent from a son’s few hours of part-time work would seem harsh.
Suggest your son “pay” his way by doing some regular chores around the house and garden so your partner can see he’s pulling his weight.
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