The 8 goals of World Cup Day 2, ranked

Spoiler alert: Cristiano Ronaldo is featured in this list.

Dear heavens, what a day of soccer.

We had a thrilling end to a Uruguay - Egypt game, a tense and back-and-forth battle between Iran and Morocco, and a Portugal - Spain game that’s already being put in the pantheon of all-time World Cup.

We also had eight goals in all those games, so let’s go ahead and rank them.

8. Bouhaddouz own goal to give Iran a win over Morocco

This was just a bummer to see, and not the way you want to see a World Cup game decided. Morocco was the better team for most of the 94 minutes played in this match, but Iran got a free kick, Bouhaddouz caught it wrong, and that was that.

7. Da Gea’s howler

David Da Gea is one of the best goalies alive, so it was extremely strange to see him bungle a Cristiano Ronaldo shot from distance and let it go in. I mean, a fine goal, I guess, but goals aren’t as fun when they’re gifted.

6. Cristiano Ronaldo penalty kick

Cristiano Ronaldo gets bonus points for earning the penalty kick, on a tough, borderline call on Nacho. (I think it was a penalty.) Ronaldo finished coolly, and Nacho would redeem himself later in the game. (More on that to come.)

5. Diego Costa team goal

I love this goal, and it just speaks to the quality of the next four that this isn’t ranked higher. This is right off the training ground, David Silva to Busquets to Diego Costa for an easy finish. My favorite part about it was the fact that everyone on Portugal, everyone in the stands, hell everyone watching knew where David Silva was going to put that first ball, and it didn’t matter — he put it on Busquets’ head, and that was it.

4. Gimenez header

This is how you win a game in the final seconds. Egypt will feel hard done by after nearly 90 minutes of wonderful team defense, and great play without the injured Mohamed Salah. But Gimenez was too strong and too powerful on this header, and it gave his team the win.

3. Diego Costa’s solo effort

Diego Costa is such a wonderful addition to this Spain team because he gives them another option. When the beautiful tight passing and fluid play fails, you can always huff it up, let the big man elbow Pepe in the neck, beat two guys, and rocket it in. And don’t you dare say Pepe should have earned a foul on that. Not after the life Pepe lived. He doesn’t get the benefit of the doubt there.

2. Nacho’s laser

Look at how Nacho hits this ball. Good god. There might be no better way to hit a soccer ball. I screamed.

1. Ronaldo free kick

Who else? Portugal has built their entire team on getting the ball up to Cristiano Ronaldo and letting him do shit. He scored three, including a free kick goal in the dying moments to give his team a 3-3 tie against their peninsular rivals. What more can one man do?